Barry Bonds’ fat head

Posted: March 7, 2006 in Uncategorized
He’s a ‘roid child. C’mon, we all knew it. He had to throw away every hat he purchased before 1998 because they wouldn’t fit anymore. Now there’s a book detailing his regimen of doping. Of course, they’re reporters, not close pals, so they could be lying…but that doesn’t explain why a St. Bernard’s collar became too small for him after the age of 35. And please, when he sez things like "They’re just letting him do it because he’s a white boy" (referring to Mark McGwire cheating with ‘roids), why doesn’t anybody in the media call out his comments as racist instead of "racially charged"? Oh yeah, that’s right…cuz he’d never give them interviews ever again.
 
So I’ll do it. He’s a cheating racist.
 
Well, looks like I won’t be getting an interview with him now. Maybe he’ll forget I said it after Spring training, when the roid rage dissipates, and he’ll welcome me to his locker in the "off limits" corner after a big game lost. He might even let me sit in his Barcalounger, and fetch me a $12 king beer.
 
Then suddenly Raffy Palmeiro will remind him I once said something about him cheating, and he’ll sit on me until I turn purple. That’ll leave a permanent impression on the Barcalounger…
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