More Top 10 submissions

Posted: October 4, 2006 in Uncategorized
Still trying to get another stupid mousepad…nope, still haven’t received the last one I won…
 
Top Ten Questions To Ask Yourself Before Buying A Ticket On The New Passenger Spaceship
  • Will I be stuck in the middle seat between two fat guys?
  • Will the length of the security checkpoint line make me miss my flight?
  • Will 40 years of built-up frequent flier miles even pay for lift-off?
  • When using the airsickness bag, is it better to barf upward or downward?
  • Dammit, I know I’ve heard the answer dozens of times from NASA astronaut interviews…how do I pee in space?
  • Is there a Million-Mile High Club?
  • Will this thing have parachutes?
  • If I scream in space, will everybody hear me?
  • Would anybody really care if I pushed President Bush out the airlock?
  • What, am I nuts?
  • Does weightlessness make my ass look fat?
  • What’s the in-flight movie?
  • I wonder what vodka and Tang tastes like…
  • How the hell can I claim this as a work-related tax deduction?
  • Oh God, why did I trade my sanity for a couple of magic beans?
  • Hmmm, the flight plan goes over Afganistan a few times…will we finally go looking for Osama?
  • Was that alcohol I smelled on the captain’s breath…?
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