Probably not a nuke

Posted: October 13, 2006 in Uncategorized
So last week the self-proclaimed deity in North Korea announces he detonated an underground nuke, then follows that with "act of war" babble-talk concerning sanctions against his country. Of course, everybody scrambled to figure out if the nuke had actually happened, since seismology monitoring didn’t pop off any warning klaxons…and it was determined that if it WAS a nuke, it was probably either a dud or an itsy-bitsy nuke.  Now we have word that there’s no detectable radiation to suggest a nuke was detonated at all.
So what’s up with the far-east’s Jim Jones, anyway? Well, I figure it was probably a conventional bomb he detonated to try and trick everybody, with the hopes of easing restrictions from the U.S. by "threatening" global thermonuclear war (yup, the "kill ’em with kindness" lesson isn’t taught in their school systems). In other words, he’s being a whiny little bitch. He fully understands that Hitler lost because Adolf decided to fight a war on two fronts, and the U.S. has its hands full with Iraq and Afghanistan (not to mention FEMA and Homeland Security), so he’s hoping we just give him the cookie before he has to go down for his afternoon nap. He probably thinks he’s too old for a spanking, too.

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