T.O. just can’t shut up

Posted: January 23, 2007 in Uncategorized
Bill Parcells retires from coaching the Cowboys, and sez it wasn’t Terrell Owens’ fault. Naturally some sports writer has to get Owens’ opinion on the matter…
 
"T.O. said that Parcells fostered an unhealthy locker room environment."
Translation: "I took notes from a true master"
 
"Parcells…did not offer and words of encouragement after his accidental overdose"
Translation: "Seriously, the text messaging feature of my phone don’t work for shit"
 
"When I talked to him for the first time we left an impression on each other"
Translation: "Neither of us heard a goddam word the other said"
 
"I was underutilized in the offense"
Translation: "The high percentage of balls thrown my way doesn’t count! I couldn’t catch them because of (broken hand, broken finger, tight hamstring, tripped, was too lazy, Bledsoe was quarterback, Romo lost his composure, etc), so Coach always favored Terry Glenn.
 
"But my teammates know I could have done more."
Translation: "I didn’t throw EITHER quarterback under a bus"
 
"(Parcells) is like my grandmother. You love the person, but they are stuck in their old-school ways."
Translation: "The old fart actually thought he could coach a football team well enough to win a Super Bowl! Ain’t that a hoot?"
 
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